Eating Nemo...

So...

Starter: Thanks for the feedback from the last entree' (sorry) it has been really positive, although perhaps not so much for Google... (wordpress migration anyone?)but alas glad you enjoyed and thanks for your props/referrals. Looking forward to becoming diabetic, obese and gastrically incompetent for you guys!

The Main: We come to the meaty part. Meat. Tough, juicy, succulent makes men, men and women... well, attractive. The point is meat is good. Anyway,the above description has found a kin in the restaurant I attended yesterday "805" on Old Kent Road. Like meat, not without its charms, but eaten often will probably drive you mad like cow.

Before turning up I had heard many a rumour good and bad about the 805. One of them being its Nigerian. full stop. I kid, Love my Naija's but it certainly has its fair share of customers with a diverse range of reviews, so I took it upon myself to endeavour to put the full stop behind all of those rumours and get the Lo up on the 805. How cool am I...


805 contrary to most African eatery's is actually rather spacious. Two wall long booths line the walls with a range of tables nicely spread across the dining room. It can get cosy when busy which appears to be often, but you can't blame a place for its success. However you can blame it for not dealing with it.

The lighting perfectly befitted while symbiotically creating a pleasant atmosphere in which to dine. Although it also conversely served to illuminate the lost expressions from people who came, saw, and weren't sure. The seating plan requires more guidance and understanding so people have an idea of where they would like to sit upon entry and adjustments are not being concurrently made to the discomfort of those already seated. I was also 2 hours early in being half an hour late to a dinner, so had ample time to ogle the paint work.

Also in that wondrous time I saw a man hustled out the building attempting to smash the windows in "revenge."(You know that was his gaff as well) and the police make roadside raids. Not to mention I wandered onto a gypsy campsite looking for a cash point... Nonetheless 805 maintained a very professional feel and approach throughout and their staff approachable and helpful.

I ordered one of 805's renowned signature dishes from their Grilled Moniker menu - Cracker fish served with plantain and salad (£15). And it didn't disappoint. The fish was succulent, with a range of flavours one wouldn't find in their local Tesco's, (unlike the alfresco salad) with the portion size particularly large enough to feed two adults and a baby seal at a stretch. Combined with the not too ripe plantain the dish went down a treat. Could've used more garnish with the salad but small graces. However it does make one acutely aware of the need to order the right dish at such an establishment, lest risk the wrath of mediocrity being hinted at here...

Dessert: 805 is certainly a place I would recommend for business dinners, dates and the like. It provides a professional cultural offering to the wider UK community evidenced by its diverse range of guests and serves to offer food of sufficient quality and portions to satisfy the hungriest of Hippos. I wouldn't recommend 805 for large birthday functions although there was a separate room designed for this purpose at extra charge, this too proved a little too snug and immobile for a free following birthday dinner. However when 805 cook they can cook and well, it is just a question of when. Worth checking out if you are ever in the South London area at a loose end and looking for a nice relaxed place to chow down, just don't bring an army.

Gourmerating of 74% (Give or take!)

Thanks for reading, also your mum likes my cooking.

Restaurant: 805 eatery.

Location: 805 Old Kent Road. London, SE15 1NX

Website: http://www.805restaurant.com

Contact: 0207 639 0808

Opening Times: Variable

Transport: Good parking facilities in the surrounding area, increased after hours of control operation. Good public transport links with a range of buses stopping just outside from Elephant and Castle tube, and South Bermondsey, New Cross and New Cross Gate rail stations.